


Why Sansa and Tyrion can't have a dinner party!

by Shining_M00nlight5679



Series: New Westeros AU [1]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Established Relationship, F/M, Family Dinners, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff, Gen, Gossip, M/M, Modern Westeros, Party, Talking about family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:07:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26975626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shining_M00nlight5679/pseuds/Shining_M00nlight5679
Summary: Sansa and Tyrion want to have a nice family dinner. It isn't as easy as it seems.
Relationships: Tyrion Lannister/Sansa Stark
Series: New Westeros AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1968595
Comments: 14
Kudos: 39





	Why Sansa and Tyrion can't have a dinner party!

**Author's Note:**

> So I really hope I can make this into a big series. I have it all laid out in my head. I'm just really bad at bringing it to paper.  
> There are some rare pairings in here and one especially I would like to know if you can spot it.  
> The ages of the characters are pretty different from the original series but I have a reason for that. (I think, I can’t remember why I made some decisions but their are reasons)  
> Actually most of the ideas I have for this AU will take place before this story. So this is technically a spoiler for the stories I hopefully will one day write, but since I’m not the most consistent writer that may take a while.

“Ok I think we should have a nice family dinner” Tyrion said while walking into the living room where Sansa was sitting on the couch watching TV.

Sansa stopped the show and turned to Tyrion.  
“Don’t we have that everyday? Do you not like our dinners with our daughter?” She asked with a fake hurt look on her face.

“Of course I love our little family dinners but that’s not what I’m talking about. Twice a month my father commands us to his mansion for a family dinner with all the Lannisters and I think we should do something similar just with both sides of our family. You know small, siblings and parents maybe minus Cersei and Tywin.”

Sansa had to laugh “That would only leave Jamie on your side and you know that would never fly by your father. And small? You can so forget that”

“What? Why? We just invite the most essential people”

Tyrion's beautiful wife raised an eyebrow.  
“Ok lets play this through. Sibling and parents: That means Mom and Dad for me and Tywin for you. That already are 6 and a half people.”

“Six and a half? Since when do you only count me as half a person? I know my father does but now my wife too?”

“Not you, my dear husband. This one” Sansa said and pointed to her stomach that by now started to show a slight curve.

“Oh of course how could I forget. But why exactly are we counting the little cup? You don't believe we need that long to plan this do you?”

“No I’m counting the little PUP, because I’m eating for two and we need to count how much food we need”

“Fine go on then, my dear”

“So 6 and a half plus our siblings. That two more for you and six more for me”

“Six? Does the Greyjoy boy really need to come?”

“Yes he does, he grew up with us. He is like my brother and you know he isn’t the Greyjoy boy anymore”

“OK fine”

“So now we are at 15. Before you asked, Arya being pregnant rounds the half up to a hole now.”

“Ok, so food for 15 people that shouldn’t be too hard to manage”

“Wait, wait, wait. I’m not done yet.  
All our siblings are either married or at least engaged which means we have to invite their significant others and of course their kids.  
So Margery plus two, Mya plus one, Rhaenys plus two, Gendry, Meera, Shireen, Robert plus three and Brienne plus three. Oh and Myrci probably will want to bring Trystane.”

“I can’t believe my 10 year old niece has a boyfriend she needs to bring everywhere” Tyrion interrupted but Sansa ignored him.

“That adds up to 35 people and a lot of tension. Robert still has some issus that Rhaegar's son married his daughter and Cersei hates Mya and Gendry for existing.”

“Ok so it’s not going to be small but still manageable”

“Yes but now that we are already at 35 people it doesn’t look like a casual family dinner anymore and then something very predictable is going to happen, because who is my brother's father in law?”

Now it dawned Tyrion what Sansa meant.  
“Mace Tyrell”

“Exactly and what is Mace Tyrell gonna do when he hears of a large gathering of people which incliúdes your father, his daughter and grandchildren anyway?”

“He’s going to invite himself” Tyrion signs 

“He is going to invite himself to make business deals with your father.  
Which means he is going to bring his wife to look good and Olenna is obviously going to come since she is not going to let her son talk business with Tywin Lannister without her being present. That would end up in a disaster.  
And then this is going to bring a whole wave of people.  
First Loras will tag along if there is already so much of his family there anyway.  
I don’t think Willas and Garlan are gonna come. Willas doesn’t like crowds and Leonette is on bedrest so Garlan takes care of the kids by himself so he will probably not want to leave her alone.  
But Loras is going to bring Renly. So now that Renly and Loras are there it kind of looks like people are bringing their siblings to which means Bella and Edric are going to come since 5 of their siblings are already there plus their father and their cousin and their uncle.  
Now we are at 42 people and with Edric even more tension. I mean Cersei already has a problem with Gendry, Mya and Bella but Edric, Edric will give her the rest for being born while she was already married to Robert.  
So 42 ..But we’re still not done because if siblings are coming Rhea is going to bring Aegon and Torrhen. So now that all of their kids are at this party that his niece is throwing, Uncle Benjen and Elia will come too.  
Probably Dany will tag along as well because they wouldn't wanna exclude her. Also of course Jojen and Asha will come too.  
That gives us 49. Ok good.  
But with Dad, Benjen, Robert, Renly and Shireen there, Brandon and Stannis will be there as well. Stannis will look at it as an important meeting he can’t miss and he will bring his wife too.”

“As long as he doesn’t bring his weird friend”

“I don’t think so, he doesn’t really have anything to do with this but what do you have against Davos?”

“Oh not Davos. I like Davos. I was talking about Melisandre”

“Oh god, I really hope she doesn’t come. I really don’t understand what is happening between him and this woman. It’s so weird.  
I mean he is Stannis Baratheon. He is the last person I would ever expect to have a... mistress??? ...that he shares with his wife? I just don’t know what’s going on there but he better not bring that mess into our house.  
But I don’t think he is going to do that anyway especially not if Robert is there to comment on it. So where was I?”

“Stannis and Brandon”

“Oh yeah right. So Brandon is going to come obviously and that means Ed and Beth are coming to possibly the other two kids as well”

“Kids? Elyana is like 10 years older than you”

“Ok but they are still Brandons kids and Tyanna is still only 11 so she still qualifies as a child. Oh wait, I totally forgot Tyanna is definitely not going to come, her mother moved her and herself back to Essos.”

“Really I didn’t know that. I thought she wanted Tyanna to have a good relationship with her father. Why and when did she decide to move back to Essos?”

“Oh just a few weeks back. She hates Brandon's new wife, who is by the way coming to if Brandon is, and doesn’t think she is a good role model for her daughter.. called her a whore”

“That’s rich coming from her. Didn’t Brandon bring her and a two year old Tyanna to Westeros a year after his divorce with wife number 3 was through?”

“Yep he did and I feel like we shouldn't refer to my Uncles Wifes with Numbers”

“UUh, but he changes them so fast it’s hard to keep up with the names”

“Ha ha, if I’m honest I actually hope this one will be gone soon too. I can’t really stand her either and I have my bet on three and a half years before they announce that they are getting divorced and that is only one and a half years away”

“You actually have bets on how long Brandons marriages last?”

“Oh yeah since wife number three, as you so elegantly called her. I was only 13 I think when they married and even I knew that Brandon would not be able to stay married to a woman Grandpa picked for him.  
So my siblings, my cousins and me made some bets on how long this marriage is going to last but I feel like we are getting off-topic. At what number were we?”

“Sweet, I have no idea I could barely follow your rant” 

Sansa started counting her fingers and doing the math all over again.

“Ok with Stannis, Selsey, Brandon, wife and kids we’re a 56.  
Good let’s go on if all of his sons and grandchildren are there Grandpa will come of course. And while I don’t really like it Barbery will come too. She loves being around all these important people, just like Mace and she has an excuse to come because of Ed and Beth.”

“Do you think Ashara is gonna come as well since you think Elyana is coming”

“I’m not quite sure but if Elia is there” 

Sansa paused for a moment

“Let’s just count her too just in case.  
Now if Dad is bringing his brothers and father, Mom's family is coming too.  
Grandfather will also not let an opportunity go by where he can be with his family and also talk business to people. Edmure just loves to party and Lysa can’t be excluded or you have to listen to it for 10 years.  
Brynden just loves being with us so he will be there to. Edmure will bring Roslin and Lysa brings Jon and Sweetrobin. Now we are at... Oh no Oh no Oh no”

“What???”

“Roslin is a Frey”

“Oh God no”

“Exactly! We can’t host a dinner when all the Freys are coming!  
This can’t be happening. And you know bloody well if one child of his will be there Walder Frey will come and bring as many of his children and grandchildren as he can.  
What are we gonna do about it?”

Tyrion had an idea.

“Maybe we can put something like a Frey limit.  
We can make official invitations if you think it’s going to be this big anyway and everybody only gets to bring one other person most people wont bring a plus one since they will be invited anyway.  
That way we limit the number of Freys to six.”

“Six why six?”

“Well with Hoster, Rickard and Elia coming it looks like we are inviting significant other parents which means they would expect us to invite Walter for Roslin.  
So with Walder, Roslin and Emmon are three people who will bring one additional Frey"

Sansa looked a little bit sceptical: "Do you think we're overthinking this?"

"Well you started it"

"Ok we started this now let's finish this, so you counted Emmon so I'm assuming you already counted all of your Aunts Uncles and Cousin since mine are all coming. To which number are we getting then?"

"Well let's see. We already counted Emmon, so Genna is one. Then Kevan and his wife plus 4 kids, well or 3 because Lancel is an Idiot."

"Four kids!"

"Fine, four kids. Tygett plus two. And then of course the best of all Gerion and Joy. That gets us to 84? Is that correct?

“I got to the same number, so are we missing anybody?” Sansa aked.

“Barristan?”

“Oh of course how could I forget Barristan.  
Ok you know what if we are at this high of a number anyway we can invite Howland, Jyana and Selwyn. I’m pretty sure that’s almost everyone we could invite.  
No wait! If Elia and Trystan are coming we can invite Oberyn, Doran, Qyentyn and Arianna.  
Of course we would invite Ellaria and Oberyn's daughters. I mean that “only” increases our number by 17 which would get us to the total number off 101 people”

“So much to the small family dinner.”

“Well I guess with a little bit of effort we could keep it smaller, but where would the fun be in that?”

“So we are actually doing this we are going to throw a party for 101 people”

“Well maybe not everybody will come.”

Tyrion smirked. 

“I hope everybody will come. The drama is going to be amazing.”

**Author's Note:**

> Please tell me what you think.


End file.
